Monday, December 30, 2013

Lizzie Koch Week 80: Naughty and Nice

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Lizzie Koch’s Picture Choice: 1

Title: Naughty and Nice

There’s something you should know about me. I may look like the girl next door but I’m not. I may look like the next prom queen but I can assure you I’m not. I may look angelic but I am definitely not. I am the exact opposite of everything my parents want me to be and that’s no accident.

I am a victim of my circumstance, a backlash to all the kindness my parents wield, a dark corner of misery to my parents relentless sparkle and light.

You see, my parents are Mr and Mrs Christmas/Claus/Santa. And growing up at the North Pole is one gigantic icicle in my backside. I hate it. Everything is double coated in sugary sweetness, sprinkled with bucket loads of glitter and so darn nice!

No one ever gets angry. No one swears. no one curses, messes up, is late, grumpy, bad mannered, selfish or mean. It’s just always nice. Everyone is nice. I’m fed up with nice. If someone loses their temper when little hitches happen, it wouldn’t be so bad but all hitches are dealt with by being nice.

I don’t know why I’m different. Why do I want to cause mischief? Where did I learn to lie? I had no idea but it’s amazingly easy as no one at the North Pole knows how to tell lies so believes everything they’re told.

So when I told elf Trixie I needed to take the Naughty and Nice book for a clean, the silly little elf believed me even though it was obvious by the glistening golden thread and the shiny leather cover that this was not the case. I’m not allowed to touch the Naughty and Nice book. The only eyes that pour over every name, delve into every soul is my dad. He alone decides whether a child has been good enough to receive a gift from him or naughty where they receive the lump of coal. I think on rare occasions, lumps of coal are given. Generally, my dad tries to see the good in everyone; because he is so nice.

I didn’t want the book to give everyone a lump of coal, that would be no fun at all. Who wants to see misery on Christmas Day? No, I wanted it to see who had been so naughty, they were never going to get anything but coal for the rest of their lives.

I wanted to see who was so removed from nice, they didn’t even care if they got a lump of coal every year. Surprisingly, the book was bursting with goodness; it seemed it wasn’t just the North Pole that was filled with nice. But finally, a name sprung out at me, so deep in red, it appeared to bleed. My fingers glided over the name and visions flashed in front of me; jumbled and blurred, giving me a headache. Obviously, there was some knack to using this book. I’m a Claus. How hard can it be?

I concentrated really hard this time and the images focused; the wrong deeds and the address of this naughty, free spirited girl. She was so far from nice, I doubted she would even know how to spell it. Excitement surged through me. With the book slung in my satchel, I raced to the stables and unharnessed Blitzen. He’s my favourite reindeer due to his feisty nature. We get along just fine and he quickly had me out of the North Pole, with no questions asked, for a sack of carrots. I wondered how easy it would be to buy this Lindsay? My idea was cool, so cool, she couldn’t possibly refuse.

I found Lindsay propped up at a bar. Her price was easy enough; a drink or two. She was easy to befriend until I told her who I was. She laughed so hard, she fell off her stool. Helping her up, I managed to lead her out back where Blitzen stood, waiting patiently. Still Lindsay laughed until she sat on Blitzen. With a snap of my fingers they were gone. The North Pole would be good for Lindsay. She needed some colour in those cheeks, needed people around her being kind and thoughtful. I made her look like me too which was an amazing piece of magic, body swapping. I’d always wanted to try it. Of course, eventually, someone would find out but until then, I could be naughty, well just a little. Looking like Lindsay, I smiled. I loved the clothes although the super flared jeans were rather long and old fashioned. I felt something strange on my ankle. Reaching down, I pulled up the trouser leg. Ok, so that’s a slightly weird fashion accessory; a large chunky, black bracelet sat around my ankle. I couldn’t move it or unlock it.

“Hey, Lindsay, what you doing out here!” a voice yelled behind me. I saw a man mountain rumble towards me. “You can’t hang out in alleyways. People will think you’re scoring. You’re not are you?” The man looked nervously around the alley. I had no idea what on earth he was on about as he ushered me back to the front of the bar. “Tell me you didn’t score,” he hissed, directing me into a waiting car as a group of strangers gathered round and flashes exploded around me.

“No, I didn’t. But I would like to go back into the bar.”

“Are you kidding? Can you see those paps out there? One picture of you drinking and you’re back in front of the judge. Jesus, Lindsay! Get a grip.”

I stared out the window and couldn’t help but smile as the flashes lit up the car with them shouting my name. I loved the buzz they gave me and wanted more. Without hesitation, I opened the car door and jumped out, lapping up the attention, the call of my name, posing as best I could before I was dragged back in and the car whizzed off.

I don’t remember much else. Lindsay must have drank far too much before I switched bodies.

I awoke with a thumping headache made worse by the shrill cries of a woman running into my bedroom and throwing a newspaper at me. Eagerly, I picked it up, staring at the front page. My face, Lindsay’s face spread right across it. I scowled. I know I wanted to get away from being nice but that headline was downright rude and a lie.

Li-Lo in alleyway drugs and drink shocker . . .AGAIN!

I guess I had chosen well for my naughty stint.

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I dream of sharing my work with the big wide world one day as a published author. Right now, I share flash fiction with a wonderful community of writers and friends. If you liked this story, then why not visit my blog at http://40somethingundomesticateddevil.blogspot.co.uk/ for more. Thank you. Love Lizzie x

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